Saturday, 29 December 2007

Non PC Jail jokes

I read in the Mail earlier today about how sexist jokes are now banned in prisons in the UK, Firstly er why? Most of the sexist jokes I have been told are hilarious and secondly I'd like to see this law enforced. Below is a few examples which are now banned, they come from the Tv show Porridge:

Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%. It's called a wedding cake.

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut and still think they are sexy.

Why do men die before their wives? They want to.

In the beginning, God created the Earth and rested. The God created Man and rested. The God created Woman. Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.

How many men does it take to open a bottle of beer? None. It should already be opened when she brings it.

Why do women have smaller feet than men? it's one of those 'evolutionary things' that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.

How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? When she starts a sentence with 'A man once told me...'

Why is a laundrette a really bad place to pick up a woman? Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never support you.

If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first? The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.

If you have anymore please let me know!


Damon Lord said...

For some humour about women's driving...

Corporal G said...

"Buck up and be jolly, my dear lady! Stillbirth is a sign that God has a sense of humour!" - Oscar Wilde

Corporal G said...

Oh I meant to say, for more good, insightful old-fashioned wit from a pair of gents, visit Res Profunditas.